557 Days: Kids?
Hello Internet, we meet again.
557 Days.
I've been married for that many days. I know it's not that long, but long enough for people to ask us (me & my husband) about kids. And that isn't considered improper or impolite by society, something that I strongly disagree.
For us getting married and having kids are two different things. At that time, we were ready to get married, but not ready enough to have kids right away. Our priority was to to know each other much better as spouses. Also, we wanted to enjoy life as a married couple first, just the two of us, considering the fact that we had to move overseas for a year right away after the wedding, the timing was just not right.
And then now, four months after we got back to Indonesia, we're still in the same stance as we were 557 days ago. We're not ready yet.
The more I think about it, the more not ready I am. Like, in every aspect. In my opinion, having kids means great responsibility. Because contrary to popular opinion, I believe that parents owe their kids what they deserve, not the other way around.
I mean, kids don't asked to be born, right? So for me to have kids means responsibility to raise a human being to be 'a good part' of society. I will owe them that. And that require the best version of me as parents. And right now, I don't think I'm there yet, not even close.
But different than me 557 days ago, the-present-me is now making effort to be 'the best version' that I could, or the closest that I could get, to be a parent. I don't know how long I have to work things out, but I believe when the time come I'll know. And I hope at that time Allah also trusted me with a gift, that is a child.
I know this seems a bit random, and probably the most serious (and personal) thing I ever wrote in this blog, but I really wanna pour it out here. As a reminder to not judge other people’s life/ choices because we never knew how it feels to be in their shoes. Instead, respect them because we never knew what happened behind the scene.
And last, I was lucky to have a good support system so I didn’t let those comment got through me. But it’s not always the case with everyone. Remember, every single word that we say could affect other people’s life. So be kind to one another. Be respectful.
Ajus
_ _ _
PS:
Yes you may already guess, I currently has nothing to do as it's already 11 PM and my husband is still on the way home from work. That's why I'm here, as always.
557 Days.
I've been married for that many days. I know it's not that long, but long enough for people to ask us (me & my husband) about kids. And that isn't considered improper or impolite by society, something that I strongly disagree.
For us getting married and having kids are two different things. At that time, we were ready to get married, but not ready enough to have kids right away. Our priority was to to know each other much better as spouses. Also, we wanted to enjoy life as a married couple first, just the two of us, considering the fact that we had to move overseas for a year right away after the wedding, the timing was just not right.
And then now, four months after we got back to Indonesia, we're still in the same stance as we were 557 days ago. We're not ready yet.
The more I think about it, the more not ready I am. Like, in every aspect. In my opinion, having kids means great responsibility. Because contrary to popular opinion, I believe that parents owe their kids what they deserve, not the other way around.
I mean, kids don't asked to be born, right? So for me to have kids means responsibility to raise a human being to be 'a good part' of society. I will owe them that. And that require the best version of me as parents. And right now, I don't think I'm there yet, not even close.
But different than me 557 days ago, the-present-me is now making effort to be 'the best version' that I could, or the closest that I could get, to be a parent. I don't know how long I have to work things out, but I believe when the time come I'll know. And I hope at that time Allah also trusted me with a gift, that is a child.
I know this seems a bit random, and probably the most serious (and personal) thing I ever wrote in this blog, but I really wanna pour it out here. As a reminder to not judge other people’s life/ choices because we never knew how it feels to be in their shoes. Instead, respect them because we never knew what happened behind the scene.
And last, I was lucky to have a good support system so I didn’t let those comment got through me. But it’s not always the case with everyone. Remember, every single word that we say could affect other people’s life. So be kind to one another. Be respectful.
Ajus
_ _ _
PS:
Yes you may already guess, I currently has nothing to do as it's already 11 PM and my husband is still on the way home from work. That's why I'm here, as always.
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